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This is part 4 in a 12 part Series on D.I.S.C.I.P.L.E.S.H.I.P. - Twelve Tips to help you become a more effective discipler of children.

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing. - 1 Thessalonians 5:11

The purpose of discipleship is not to merely pass on spiritual or biblical information. It is to guide and stimulate spiritual GROWTH in those you disciple. What you know is not as important as what you do, and what you do is not as important as who you are. As a discipler, one of the most critical aspects of your job is to challenge your disciplee to the next level in their walk with Christ.

And we urge you, brothers, warn those who are idle, encourage the timid, help the weak, be patient with everyone. - 1 Thessalonians 5:14

You are not asking them to be a Super Christian, or to be perfect - but you are challenging them to move ahead, to progress from where they currently are. How do you do that?

The first key is knowing where they are currently and then challenge them to move to the next realistic level. How often do they read their Bible, honestly? If it is once or twice a week - encouraging daily devotions may be the worst thing you can do. It may lead to a sense of failure or discouragement. But if you can encourage them to one extra day a week than they are currently doing, you have progress. Offer to use a phone call, email or text message to remind them. And let them hold you accountable too!

Preach the Word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction. - 2 Timothy 4:2

If they have not memorized much scripture, some I’ve already stated is critical, then work on something together. A psalm perhaps. If they have memorized a lot, then challenge them to memorize a book! I would have never memorized the book of James if my discipler hadn’t said, “I think you are ready to discover the power of memorizing an entire book.” So I did, and have led many others in memorizing books since then.

What about witnessing? We all know we should be witnessing to the lost - it’s tough! So we need to be challenged. Ask who their unsaved friends are. Help them think of ways to witness, starting with little ways. Encourage some cold turkey witnessing to strangers. I know that had a profound impact on me early in my Christian walk.

As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another. - Proverbs 27:17

There are many aspects to the Christian faith. Whatever your lesson is on - make it personal. Get out of the theory and into real life. Ask them to tell you how they are REALLY doing in that area. If it is sensitive, then ask them to write it privately and seal it in an envelop. Then challge them to think of somethin they need to do or change to see improvement. Have them open the envelope in a month or year and see how things have improved.

One of the things I like to do with the guys I am in a discipling relationship with, or more often, a mutual accountability relationship with, is to ask the guys how they are doing with the Three W’s:

• Walk - their walk with God
• Wife - their marriage and family
• Work - their job and/or ministry

We give each other a number from 1 to 10, one being terrible and ten being perfect. As you might guess, no one ever gives a ten! This enables us to be honest without giving any personal or private info, though as we explain our “3″ or “6.5″ often we find ourselves willing and able to share what is going on in our walk, with our wife, or in our work and how it is impacting our life.

With kids, you can ask the same 1-10 question at a child’s level. How is your relationship with your parents? Your friends? How’s it going at school?

BUT HERE IS THE KEY: You have to ask, “What would it take to see that number go up?” Press for specific action steps they could take to see improvement. Things they can do, not things they hope will change. Then follow up to encourage them to succeed and to celebrate improvements and success.

It is a fact of our nature that we don’t improve unless we are challenged and then held accountable. The good news you can provide that critical help to those you disciple and even those you just care about.

So don’t just teach, become an encouager, in fact, a challenger. God will use you to help others in your life go to the Next Level in their spiritual journey.

…But let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. - Hebrews 10:25

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